Focus

KThis morning I read Romans chapter 1. Let me post part of it here: 

"18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. 19 For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. 20 For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world,[g] in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. 21 For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22 Claiming to be wise, they became fools, 23 and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things.

24 Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, 25 because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.

26 For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; 27 and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.

28 And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. 29 They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31 foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32 Though they know God's righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them."

This part talks about God's anger towards unrighteousness. It talks about when the people refused to believe in God so He gave them over to their debased (defined as "reduced in quality or value") minds and their dishonorable passions along with a host of other issues, aka. sin, that include seemingly small things like gossip, slander, selfishness, and disobedience. 

This seems so applicable to today's culture when the focus in the news is on a former Olympian who is "transgendered" and recently had a sex change to become a woman. This world is thinking this is so great, speaking out for others with the same feelings/experiences. They say it does so much for learning to accept others and for this behavior becoming normalized in our culture and our minds. 

Truth is: we probably shouldn't be talking about it. Focusing on it familiarizes us with it and eventually it doesn't seem like "that big of a deal." Focusing on it opens our minds to it becoming okay. Read the following passage in Ephesians 5.

"5 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

3 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. 4 Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. 5 For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 7 Therefore do not become partners with them; 8 for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 9 (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), 10 and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord.11 Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. 13 But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, 14 for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says,

“Awake, O sleeper,
    and arise from the dead,
and Christ will shine on you.”

15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." 

Verses 11-12 say "Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness...for it is shameful even to speak of the things they do in secret."

So, maybe we should consider we what are speaking about and what we are thinking and reading about. 

Lord, have mercy on our nation and world that is turning away from You. Across the world, Christians are being persecuted and martyred for their faith in Jesus Christ. Meanwhile, one of the top U.S. headlines is praising this person who is obviously confused, at least, and who desperately needs the Lord to redeem them from their sins. 

God, help us, help ME, to know Your heart; to know the things You want us to focus on.

 I know God loves this person and wants to see them come into a real relationship with Him. But I also know our time, MY time, may be better spent praying for our brothers and sister who are sacrificing even their very lives for You. 

If you want more info on what's happening across the world, watch this lengthy but worthwhile video: 

http://youtu.be/H2Hf1h3ay3U

To help financially you can give here: https://preemptivelove.nationbuilder.com/if

43 & Counting

No, I'm not having/adopting 39 more children. Don't get too excited. 

Today is my parents 43rd wedding anniversary, people. Forty-three years!!! How awesome is that?!?! Forty three years is definitely a longer time period than each of them were not married. 

I am so grateful for the legacy I have been given! Both sets of my grandparents were married to each other their whole lives. My dad's parent were married 60 years and my mom's parents were married for almost 56 years. Sidenote: Daniel's parents will have been married 49 years on July 30th (HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO MOM AND DAD RAKE TOO!) and Daniel's grandparents were married almost 59 years and almost 57 years! 

In a day and age when marriage and the family unit is under attack; when there is little to no difference in the divorce rate among christians and non christians; I am grateful to be in a generational line that is bucking the trend. I am grateful for parents and grandparents who aren't afraid of committment for the long haul. I am grateful to know that when my own marriage gets in a hard place I have lots of examples to look back at and be encouraged by. I am grateful for people who have been through it before me and won't be afraid to call me up and say "Work it out. Fight for your marriage. What you are doing is worth it!" 

I know marriage isn't always easy. I know my parents marriage has hard times, some VERY hard times, including the death of a child. But I also know they are committed to each other and committed to The Lord. I know that in the hard times they aren't afraid to ask for help from the authorities and people God has placed in their life. I know they may not like each other at one moment or another but they are commited to choose to LOVE one another regardless of how they feel. 

And so, on this day, July 10, 2014, my parents 43rd wedding anniversary, I feel like I am the one who is receiving the gift. The gift of a Godly example, of stability, of a secure foundation in my life, and the gift of finding joy in the journey, whether its easy to find or not! Thank you, Mom & Dad! And Happy Anniversary to you two crazy and adventurous lovebirds! ;) Love you both!

Justice & Mercy: Hand in Hand

This morning I was reading Luke 17-18. There are a lot of short stories of things that Jesus did during His ministry time here on earth. Many stories of miracles that Jesus performed and many times when He confronted the inner issues in the hearts of the people around Him. I found it very interesting that there was no distinction in when He gave mercy and when He dispensed justice. It wasn't mercy to everyone here and go to another place and only justice to the people there. They were intermingled. Mercy to the 10 lepers; judgment to the rich young ruler.  Mercy to the widow; judgment to the pharisee. Mercy to the children; judgment to the disciples. Jesus knows what each person needs at the moment He is in. He knew those who needed healing whether physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional. He was also NEVER afraid to call out those who wouldn't repent, or who wouldn't sacrifice their whole life (like the rich young ruler), or to call out the disciples whether or not they would have complete understanding of what He meant. I guess Jesus was the perfect blend of justice and mercy. Justice and mercy walking together hand in hand, united and separate in one Man.

After that I saw how that is what I spend my days doing in raising my children; trying to balance discipling and training my children with mercifully loving them, caring for them (hurt bodies and hurt feelings), and serving my children and husband whether I feel like it or not. From my journal I wrote: "Shew, I could learn from Jesus when each one is needed the most!" I am sure there are times when my children need mercy when I don't give it and times when they need the justice of training or discipline and I'm too lazy to do my job. I need His wisdom and love to focus on what builds my children's relationship with me and more importantly with the Lord.

When I shared this with Daniel this morning, I said how neat it is to see how what Jesus does applies to my life. That even though He was never married and never had children, what he did in dealing with people can apply to what I do in raising our children. Daniel had a great response which was something like: "Sometimes people say "Jesus can never understand what I'm going through BECAUSE He wasn't married and never had kids. So it can't apply to what I'm doing." When actually they are looking at it incorrectly. It shouldn't be Jesus' life can't apply to mine. Instead we should be looking at how the situations in our lives can apply to the different things His life, the things Jesus said and did."  

How greatful I am that Jesus knows the perfect blend of justice and mercy and how to apply it. I hope to learn a little more of that now that I am more aware. Thank You, God! 

Finish This: A first of sorts

So, I've never exactly done this particular link up before. I attempted the other night, wrote the entire post (from the bathroom floor of a hotel cause my baby was trying to sleep) and then lost it all trying to add a pic. Darn it all. So, I don't know if this even counts anymore. So, maybe this is a second complete waste of time. But, I really hope not.

Linking up with Nicole, Becky, Jen, & Lisa. I got to this link up from BG.  Here we go:

I have a quarter to use a pay phone, I call …. Daniel, my husband. Because if I'm calling from a pay phone I don't have my cell phone and I would assume calling would mean an emergency or that I need help of some sort and for all those things D is my go to guy! The. best.
I found $25 in my pocket, I buy … today I put it toward buying a new ipad keyboard case. One that isn't cracked. Or a bluetooth speaker for the ipad - but that is something I need for tutoring at our homeschool coop next year. 
I have 25 minutes to watch anything on TV, I turn on … The Duggars on 19 Kids and Counting or Jen Hatmakers show coming to HGTV in August. Only problem is I do not have cable of any sort. But we are dreaming, right???
A meal I can prepare, from start to finish. in 25 minutes or less is … sandwiches or cereal. Low  no prep, baby! 
At the age of 25, I wish I had known … more about classical Christian education. We are loving our coop (Classical Conversations)  and the practicum & training I attended this week was so good! 
If I drove 25 miles (direction) from my house, I’d be in … um, the middle of nowhere, KY most likely otherwise known as either Montgomery County or Bath County. Probably near the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains in rural farmland area. And between where I live and where I attended college at Morehead State University. 

Until next time...

7 Quick Takes: A day late and a dollar short...

Hellooo. (Hear this said in the deep deep voice of my 2 year old little guy.) 

Linking up with http://teamwhitaker.org for 7qt. 

uno. Shew. We made it through crazy week part 1. Now for some weekend crazy including visiting friends, picking up Asher from camp (yay!), and watching my niece and nephews overnight. 

dos. I love a good summer thunderstorm complete with a reasonable amount of lightening and thunder so long as tornadoes are not involved. I do NOT love driving through them. 

tres. I cleaned and rearranged my girls room today. Why does the kids messy rooms make me crazy eventually? I got it done though. I'm feeling very accomplished and the room is feeling very peaceful. Ahhhhh.... 

cuatro. Have I mentioned I love chocolate? LOVE IT. 

cinco. O gosh, duh, we got an iPad!! wahoo! I am so excited! And Daniel is too. :)  we bought it off Craigslist so hopefully it is a successful purchase and we don't regret it. 

seis. Traveling on car trips that are just a few hours long makes me never want to take the kids on long trips anywhere. As a kid, my family drove to Wyoming and back from Kentucky. How did my parents deal with us for that long? Bless them. 

siete. You wanna know something else I love? Skywatching at sunset. I love to see how differently God can paint the sky each night. 

And lucky you get a bonus qt this time around: my 4 year old is brushing her teeth in the car... Or at least playing with her battery powered toothbrush. Why in the car, you ask? She asks, why not? ;) 

Adios.

How to cope?

   Friends, these days are CrAzY!!! We are in the midst of the most crazy 2 weeks planned for so far this summer. And we've had some extra unexpected things added in on top of that.
   One of those things is that JRy came down with a rash. It is hand, foot, and mouth disease. Awesome. Naturally, I was thrilled to find out that we are now quarantined away from everyone for three days until he isn't contagious. Not. I'm seriously hoping it doesn't spread to others since I have a conference to go to next week. Anyway, we have been running nonstop for days. For sure since Friday, maybe longer. I don't evene remember last week. Today, I felt like I reached my limit and needed to come up with something to distract the kids and me. So, what do I come up with as a way to cope? A sprinkler! I dragged all three of the younger kiddos to the store, bought a sprinkler, and everyone chose a treat. Now we are home for rest time and then playing outside in the sprinkler! Wahoo!!! Maybe I'll join them even.With chocolate!  :)
   On another note, my oldest is away at camp for the whole week. I haven't talked to him since Sunday morning. I sure am missing this guy!

7 Quick Takes: From Nine Years to Nail Polish

So, in an effort to blog more I'm going to try this whole 7qt link up via Bek's Contemplations... and her friends at Team Whitaker. Here goes!

uno. I'm hanging out alone tonight with the kiddos while my hubs relieves my parents and stays with our friend. I'm watching a movie and painting my nails in a new color. Sally Hansen Insta Dry in Jade Jump seen here:

This is my favorite brand of nail polish ever. Ever. 

dos. I've recently started volunteering at our local pregnancy center. Tomorrow I'll spend a couple of hours at our local Beer Cheese Festival walking around, talking to people, and passing out balloons and info for New Beginnings Pregnancy Care Center. I'm excited to help out and excited to eat beer cheese!

tres. Our anniversary is coming up this week! 9 years. Amazing, awesome, wonderful, busy years. Thanks for loving me, Babe! Hey, I'm the lucky one.

quatro. Oh my goodness! My sis is going to have a new little babe next month! I'm getting super excited to meet that new little person. Little babes are the best. I will only struggle with not being able to go to her house and sit and hold that little one all day every day.

cinco. I've been potty training my littlest guy, JRY for the last couple weeks. And it's really happening! He has potty trained younger (25 months) and easier than any of the other three. Thank You, God! He was my most difficult baby and is a super busy, super active but fun and sweet dude. So, all that to say for anything, particularly potty training to be kind of "easy" is a blessing I consider nothing less than major.

seis. I saw the movie "Mom's Night Out" a few weeks ago. Twice. Loved it so much! I felt like I could totally identify with the main mom. Oh, and she was adorable. Anyway, like three days later my fam and I are at the zoo with some friends. While looking at the Andean Condor and some other very large birds, a lady walks by and proceeds to go on and on to tell my friend about some eagle cam she watches online and then spells out the website. I nearly lost it and no one with me knew why that was so hilarious! If you've seen the movie you will understand. Seriously such a funny movie!

seite. Last but definitely not least I get to watch my "god-daughter" (for lack of an official term) tomorrow for a bit. Yay! I'm happy to spend some time with her and the girls will be thrilled too. She is the cutest.

And that's it for today! Adios Amigos!

Community

   Most of my life, I've been part of a church that was small and the people are very close and involved in each others lives regularly; not just on Sunday. It's what I know to be life. To me, bringing dinners to those who are sick or have recently had a baby is normal. Stopping by unannounced isn't taboo or shocking. Men helping re-roof a house in a day and the ladies providing lunch is pretty normal. Moving a family can take half to  two-thirds of a day and about 4 trucks; and most likely none of them were rented. We talk a lot about community and I feel like we live it. This week I have seen many examples of community lived out from small things to big things caring for the dying.
   I've written before about our friends who moved to Nicaragua. Well, a couple of them have been back in town for a couple of weeks. The other day the mom of the family stopped by to see me and chat for a few minutes. When she arrived I was folding several loads of clothes I had clean and on my dining room table. She came in and said "Are you folding clothes? I can help." I told her she didn't have to, but she did it anyway and then we sat down talked for a while before she left. After she left, I thought "Wow! You know you are good friends when your friends is back in the states from another country and she comes by to say hi and helps fold your clothes while she's here!"
   Later that night I started having trouble with what I thought was my washer or dryer. (All is well now!)  I could stop doing laundry for a while because I was mostly caught up but I had to finish drying the load currently in the dryer and the load in the washer so they didn't mildew or mold. I couldn't reach my mom and she has lots going on at her house anyway, so I called another friend from church who lives just a few blocks away and asked if I could finish the loads there. Her immediate response was "Sure! Come wash or dry whatever you need to! I won't be here but you can come anyway." At the end of the day I thought "You know it's real community when both of those things happen in a day!" I am so grateful.
   On a much larger scale, there is an elderly man who attends our church. He has known my family since before I was born and has even lived with us at times. He has lived alone for many years and has no blood family nearby. He has recently been diagnosed with advanced cancer in 2 and possibly 3 places in his body. Because he is in his 80's and already lost a lot of strength, some of the normal treatments aren't options. He moved into my parents house a few weeks ago and now he has been placed on hospice care in their home. There has been such an outpouring of support for both this man and for my parents who have the responsibility of caring for him. Different people from church come almost every night to spend time with him and to give my parents some time to get out on their own, as he isn't being left alone at this point. Sometimes people come during the day. I think he feels the love and care of these people in our church. And I know my parents are blessed by being served and carried through this very difficult time as well. And I am so grateful that my parents do not have to carry this alone. That, my friends, is what community looks like. When people just sit with someone who is sick. When they take a shift of care so others can be relieved if even for a short while. When even children are willing to sing songs or read scripture on video so this man can be blessed by God's Word anytime day or night. And when this dying man, who has been an intercessor to a greater extent than anyone else I've ever known,  is waking up praying and weeping for others in the midst of his own trials. That is community.
   All this is good. So good. Life is so full and rich. And yet it is not even the end,  thanks be to God. Today I read this quote by C S Lewis: "There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." I am so thankful this is true whether we are nearing the end of life, or in the middle of it, or just at the beginning!

Sowing seeds

A couple weeks ago during my bible time, I was reading in Luke 8 and a particular passage stuck out to me. Here it is from www.biblegateway.com.

"4 While a large crowd was gathering and people were coming to Jesus from town after town, he told this parable: 5 “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on, and the birds ate it up. 6 Some fell on rocky ground, and when it came up, the plants withered because they had no moisture. 7 Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up with it and choked the plants. 8 Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up and yielded a crop, a hundred times more than was sown.”

When he said this, he called out, “Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.”

9 His disciples asked him what this parable meant. 10 He said, “The knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of God has been given to you, but to others I speak in parables, so that,

“‘though seeing, they may not see;
    though hearing, they may not understand.’[a]

11 “This is the meaning of the parable: The seed is the word of God. 12 Those along the path are the ones who hear, and then the devil comes and takes away the word from their hearts, so that they may not believe and be saved. 13 Those on the rocky ground are the ones who receive the word with joy when they hear it, but they have no root. They believe for a while, but in the time of testing they fall away. 14 The seed that fell among thorns stands for those who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by life’s worries, riches and pleasures, and they do not mature. 15 But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop."

Obviously, Jesus gave a synopsis of what this parable meant. But the other day I saw it in a new way... and as I pondered that I saw more how it applied to me. 

The first new way I saw was in relation to my children. Basically I saw that at different times they are all in all three of these places. Sometimes what I say to them seems to go in one ear and out the other as if nothing is taking root, like the seed on the path. Other times it seems to hit home with them, but later you see that they have not yet reached full maturity in that area, like the seed on the rocks that grow up but get choked out eventually. Still other times, the things I teach take root and they really begin to understand my heart and try to live by that. 

What I noticed was that in all the mentioned situations, the farmer never stopped sowing the seed. He sowed on the path, and on the rocks, and in the good soil. There are many days when I feel tired and worn out from the continual pace of life dealing with four kids 7 and under. It seems there are so many times I have to say the same things over and over again and I get so tired of feeling like nothing changes and that I'm accomplishing little to nothing. But the encouragement I received from this passage was to keep sowing! Sowing in the good, the bad, the easy, the hard! Keep Sowing! Keep sowing! It is worth it! It is God's way!

As I thought about this, I saw how it applied to me. At different times, I am all of those things: the path, the rocks, the good soil. When I am hearing something from God sometimes I ready to grow and it takes root and matures; sometimes it takes root but dies out, and sometimes I am not ready for it and it doesn't grow. But God doesn't give up on me or stop working on/in me. He keeps speaking. He keeps sowing and changing me. 

How grateful I am for His faithfulness to me and to my children! 

"Who Ever Lives and Pleads For Me..."

Today I am contemplating the words of an old hymn "Before the Throne of God Above" written by Charitie Lees Smith in 1863. In recent years it has been covered by a number of Christian musicians/artists. Below are the lyrics. What a beautiful thing to think on and remember what my Savior, my High Priest did for me. Thank you, dear Love!

"Before the throne of god above
I have a strong, a perfect plea
A great high Priest whose Name is Love
Who ever lives and pleads for me
My name is graven on His hands
My name is written on His heart
I know that while in heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart
No tongue can bid me thence depart

When Satan tempts me to despair
And tells me of the guilt within
Upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end to all my sin
Because the sinless Savior died
My sinful soul is counted free
For God the just is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me
To look on Him and pardon me

Behold Him there the risen Lamb
My perfect spotless righteousness
The great unchangeable I am
The King of glory and of grace
One with Himself I cannot die
My soul is purchased by His blood
My life is hid with Christ on high
With Christ my Savior and my God!
With Christ my Savior and my God!

One with Himself I cannot die
My soul is purchased by His blood
My life is hid with Christ on high
With Christ my Savior and my God!
With Christ my Savior and my God!"

How to deal?

They say that whatever you acted like as a kid is paid back to you through your own children. I don't know that it is actually true, but children often do end up acting like their parents? Is it because God wants "payback" for all the wrong you've done in your life? No, I really don't think so. I don't think God operates in that way. I think at least part of it is that they are actually imitating what they see going on NOW but do it to a greater degree! (Kids want to do what their parents do but to a greater degree, right? That applies to all areas of life.)
Ugh. I know, right?
"So it's all my fault?" Yes. Well, it is at least partially my fault. I am the one they see day in and day out. What else are they going to act like? Here's a question: would you let your kids watch you on TV? Eww. That's a tough one.
I have one particular child who is very much like me! Very. Much. I am at a point where she wants to do everything I do. I mean, at 4 1/2 years old, isn't she ready to do all that mom does? Clearly, we disagree on this point. I tell her not to boss, not to feed the baby without asking, not to pick up her three year old sister, not to, not to, not to.... And I feel as though I'm about to lose my mind! BUT! But, I know that as my children 4 children grow and as my firstborn daughter, I know that I am going to need her help so much! I can see her being my right arm! Te thing is, she's good as what does. She has a nurturing mothers heart. She loves babies! Her memory, unlike my mommy brain post 4 kiddos, is sharp as a tack. She can remember stuff better than me sometimes! So I know I will need her! And ultimately, I want a good lasting relationship, and eventually friendship, with my daughter.
So my question is: how do I get there without killing OR alienating her? Thoughts anyone?
The first two people I asked this question to immediately responded with "PRAY!" I need to do that more! And I am actively working on that. Buying don't feel that is enough so that leaves me wondering I really think God is big enough to handle my kids? Obviously, there are some things in me that may need to change too! Trust God. For real. I can loosen some of my control issues with my kids and allow them to be helpful and to be a part of things with me. I can find ways to intentionally bless my daughter and spend time with her. (ie.- take her to Ladies meeting with me once a month even though I really want to e alone. I'm told that one day I'll miss the company!).
On a related but bigger note: I am trying to work on not raising my voice at my kids but sound kind instead of harsh to them.
So, feel free to give your perspective on this subject and PLEASE feel free to pray for me. I need all I can get to make it through this parenting 4 kids thing! It's tough! A wild, but great ride!

Assume Goodwill

I first heard this term at a ladies retreat our church held a few years ago. One of our elder's wives gave a talk on relationships and friendships and how important it is to assume goodwill towards other people. I have found this to be so true and so valuable!
What does it mean to "assume goodwill?" It is choosing to assume the best about people. To assume the best about their intentions and actions, especially as they pertain to you.
In college I lived in a house with a few other girls and we had house parents that were around daily. One night, a roommate and I went out with a group of people and came home late in the night to find the rest of our roommates and our house mom still up waiting for us. Apparently we had hurt their feelings by not inviting them to come along. We then, in the wee hours had a big talk about including people in things you do. That left me with a bit of a bad taste in my mouth as I told myself "What are they thinking? You can't invite everyone to everything! We didn't even plan that outing. We were just invited!" (The mind justifies what the heart has chosen, right?)
To an extent I see that that still holds true. Practically, is it feasible to invite everyone to everything? Well, no. You can't always do that. But could you be more willing to open it up to more people? Maybe. Probably. Could I? Almost without a doubt, yes.
In recent time I have realized that I do not want to be held to that standard. I do not want to be responsible to include more people, when it is appropriate. (Obviously, there has to be certain times when you do thinks with specific people). Anyway, back I what I was saying. I like to be "comfortable" "in my group." Long story short, selfish, self-centered me wants to not have to include more people in things I do with friends, but I never want left out of what they do. How awful is that? Talk about a double-standard.
How does that relate to assuming goodwill? Well, when in a situation where there is the opportunity for me to have my feelings hurt, I can CHOOSE to assume goodwill. And it is a choice. And one I may need to choose multiple times in a situation. I can remind myself that it really is okay if I'm not included in everything that my friends do! It really is ok for them to do things together and not always include me. I can assume goodwill.
I had a friend who tried to work something out with me one time. She apologized for something I hadn't even known about. I told her I forgave her, but I let bad feelings and resentment creep in over time and for about a year, things between us were never right. I finally felt convicted by my attitude and went and worked it out again- from my side this time. Things have been much better since. But what if I had told myself to assume goodwill? If I had chosen that better road, I would not have lost out on a year of that great friendship.
I also see that assuming goodwill applies a lot to how I view they way other people do things or run their families. I see so much of, what I call, "competitive parenting" these days. Where my way, my view, my reasons are the best and only and right way to parent. How brash! How disgusting to think of ourselves so highly! Bottom line, if parents are seeking God (and counsel if needed), then my opinion of how they run their family shouldn't matter in the least. Parent how you want, eat how you want, discipline how you want. (I would say, as long as it is in line with what God says about those things in the Bible.) When I find myself feeling judgmental towards other because I would do things differently in my home, I need to assume goodwill! They are trying there best at this parenting thing too! And everyone needs room to live according to their own convictions and preferences. When I feel that others are judging me because of how we have chosen to run our family/household, I need to assume goodwill! They may see things differently but I shouldn't assume they are thinking negatively towards me!
Jesus was all about relationships and His whole life on earth was literally made and given to bring "Peace on earth and goodwill to men!" All so He could have a relationship with us! Think how much He assumed goodwill towards us in our sin! How much more should I freely and joyfully extend that to others!

Saying Goodbye

Why is saying goodbye so hard? Well, in a normal day-to-day situation we don't think much of it. We say bye and walk away assuming we will be able to see a person again next time we want to see them. Most of the time that is true. Sometimes it isn't. When it comes to bigger goodbyes like moving away or watching a family member or friend who is near death, saying goodbye takes on a whole new meaning. It feels so, so... permanent.

Why is that? Why is it harder to say goodbye if we think we won't see someone for a long time or even ever again? It is because we love them that saying goodbye is hard. I could say goodbye to a stranger or acquaintance knowing I'd never see them again and it probably wouldn't be that big of a deal. However, when I say goodbye, especially a "bigger" goodbye, to someone I love it is very difficult.

What is the difference between the two? It is the love. When you choose to love someone you give them something but you keep that thing with you. How does that work, you ask? Well, when you, or I, love someone its like we give them a piece of our heart. But we keep it. It belongs to them because it is the part of our heart that loves them and once you give it it is always their piece but it is always yours because it is your love being given. I guess its maybe like the best way of sharing something. You both get it! Thankfully, our hearts can always grow and expand. There is no limit to how much we can love or how many people we can love!

The hard part comes when you may have to tell someone goodbye. Because once you have given love to someone you can't really take it back. I think some people try to at times, but my theory is that deep down that person always holds that piece of your heart and whether you say goodbye on good terms or bad, there is always still a place in your heart for that person no matter what you say or how you act. The piece may be filled with joy when you think of that person.... Or maybe some other emotion. But I don't think it can ever be completely gone because, like I said, it's your heart and your love but you have given it away and that part now belongs to them forever. You can't kick them out and give that piece to someone else. It doesn't work that way. When you choose to love someone new, your heart expands and makes more pieces to love more people. (Which is so cool when you relate this to the heart of God because just as we can grow more love, his infinite love is more perfect, more able to love more people! This is why He can love each person on earth and desire a relationship with each person! Oh how He loves!)

So, why all the talk on love and goodbyes? Because this week some dear friends of mine are moving most of their family from our town in Kentucky to Nicaragua. Think on that a minute. Nicaragua. An entirely different country!! For how long? Only God knows. Literally. So, it's been a long lead up (because we've known for a year now that this is coming) to several hard, tear-filled, gut-wrenching days of goodbyes. They leave tomorrow. So yes it was a "big" goodbye. Yes, as their son said, part of my heart is now going to Nicaragua. I have no idea when/if I'll see them again on earth. Really though, that is true of every goodbye, whether big or small. We are never given assurance of tomorrow or even the next moment.

So I am left here with grief. But because my friends and I share a love for Jesus Christ I am also left with hope. Hope that I will see them again. Hopefully on earth but if not, then in eternity. Hope that both they and I are going to be able to love more people. Hope that through their lives, God is going to be able to move in the lives and hearts of the people of Nicaragua! Hope that the pain I feel in saying goodbye is worth it because of the joy of knowing and sharing life with these dear friends! (And thankfully because of this today's technology, staying in touch won't be too difficult!)

Today I spent a lot of time pondering the quote "Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." For most of the day I wasn't sure i believed it was true. But after collecting all my thoughts here I have realized that yes, choosing to love can be risky... and even painful at times. But it is, oh, so worth it for the joy of sharing love!

2013: Looking at What Does (or doesn't) Lie Ahead

(So, I've sucked at this blog thing, but I want to get better. Gonna try for once a week this year.)

LESS:
A few years ago, around New Years, I heard some radio DJ’stalking about the new year ahead and asking listeners to call in with one wordthat the caller was going to focus on for that year. I listened to a few callsand thought “Boy, is that ever cheesy!” Fast forward a year or two and around NewYears I felt God calling me to do just that focus on one word for the year. Forthat year my word was “Different.” At the end of that year, when I looked back,I wanted things in my life to look differentthan it did at the beginning of the year.  I can’t tell you everything that happened thatyear, but one major thing was that I ran a 5k that year. I had never done thisbefore. I had no intent on doing it at the beginning of the year. And I did notdo run the race perfectly. I was slow. Very. Slow. And I walked some of it. Alot of it, actually. BUT, I crossed the finish line! And that was different forme. I was/am not a runner.

Now it is 2013 and yesterday I spent a few minutes thinking andpraying about this year. What do I want this year to look like? What does Godwant this year to look like? Almost immediately the one word thing came tomind. I thought “If I did that this year, what would my word be?” Just assuddenly, the word “LESS” came to mind. Fun, huh? So I spent a few minutes contemplatingwhat that might mean for me.

What does "less" literally mean? According to the dictionary it is: A smaller amount of; not as much; Of lower rank or importance; To a smaller extent; not so much; Minus; An inferior.

I do believe that “LESS” is a word God has given me, or rathercalled me to, this year. But as I contemplated less of certain things, Iquickly saw that less of one thing would likely bring more of something else.More of something that was better, more important, more eternal.

Less of what? Here’s a few things that came to mind:

1.    Food: I need to lose weight. A lot. So eatingless would help with that right and require me practicing more self control.(PS – I’m going to reread a book “Made to Crave” by Lysa Terkeurst. It has alot of godly things to say about this topic).

2.   Facebook/Internet/Phone time: Ability to doother things like read, etc. I would be more available to my children. I would beless consumed by my “unreal world” and more in the now.

3.   Me: I am selfish. Less of me would mean moreability to love God more and others more – like those pesky neighbor kids. Theyneed Jesus. JUST LIKE I DO. My dislike of them being around shows just howbadly I need Jesus to intervene in my life and my heart. This would also makeit easier for me to be willing to open our home to those Daniel wants to reachout to. Not just those who are my idea.

4.   Laziness: Not getting up before the kids byusing an alarm has me flustered because I have no time to myself in themornings. If I set an alarm and got up earlier than the kids – 7:00am, than Iwould have more time to have quiet time with God=More relationship! More timein the Word, more time to pray, some time to just sit and listen for Him tospeak. It would also allow for me to exercise in the mornings and maybe get ashower. Woah! Lofty goals, huh? Baby steps.

5.   Clutter: That can only help my house staycleaner right? Let’s hope so.  As GKChesterton said “There are two ways to get enough. On is to continue toaccumulate more and more. The other is to desire less.”

6.   Chaos: Do I need a regular schedule? Maybe. I’llbe thinking on this. I get overwhelmed by the rigidness of a regulardaily/weekly schedule. My free spirit does not like the idea of this, but itsure would help things get done.  

7.   Christmas: I’ve been reading a lot on a blog(thenatos.com) about her quest to simplify their Christmas this past year andfocusing on instilling gratefulness in their family members. I easily get intothe mode of wanting to get my kids lots of stuff to make them happy, because Iknow they’d love this… and this…. And this….! But I want less of that greedystuff-infested attitude in me and more of the focus to be on Jesus and what abeautiful amazing miracle He did for us just by being born as a baby.

I’m going to stop there for now. If I continue I am going tobe so overwhelmed that I’ll give up before getting started.

Here are a few verses that I found in the bible when I searched for the word "less."

Deut. 6:5: Love the Lord your God with all your heart andwith all your soul and with all your might.

Is. 41:24: Behold you are nothing . And your work is lessthan nothing; an abomination is he who chooses you.

2 Cor. 12:15: I will most gladly spend and be spent for yousouls. If I love you more, am I to be loved less?

2 Chron. 6:18: But will God indeed dwell with man on theearth? Behold, heaven and the highest heaven cannot contain you, how much lessthis house that I have built!

For now, you can pray for me as I begin my journey of “LESS”.Feel free to ask me how it’s going and call me on things you see going on in my life that don’t match up to this calling. I don’t know exactly what I think this will look like at the end of the year. And I’m ok with that. Mostly, at the end of the year, I just want to see evidence of positive change in my life. Forward motion. Towards a greater degree of Him and less of me.

Oh, and as Daniel said – “Hopefully that doesn’t mean I’m going to lose my job this year.” Hehe!

Grace.

I'm doing this "No S" thing to lose weight. I still think of it as a diet but i'd really like to think of it as a lifestyle change.

Anyway, there has been so much grace for the last two weeks. (This weekend has been harder and I haven't done as well...). Back to grace: last Sunday morning I walked into my pantry and noticed an open package of Oreo's on the top shelf. I had put them there and had eaten some so I knew they were there, BUT I forgot. Forgot! Can you believe that?!?! Ok, so maybe you don't struggle with food the way I do and that's a great for you! Seriously, you have no idea how great that really is. (But, let's be honest, you have your own struggles. Right? ...right?) Anyway, so I forgot about the Oreo's; which is pretty much a miracle considering that I'd there is sweets in the house I pretty much wake up thinking about it!

I felt that being that it was the first week of me trying to change my thinking and my life, that this gift of not thinking about the Oreo's in the pantry was a real gift from God!
Thank You!!

Does God care about whether or not I think about the Oreo's? When something, even little things, compete with the attention I should be giving to God, then I believe He most definitely cares! I am grateful for the grace to say no and look forward to more of that!

And now, as I'm falling asleep mid- post, I'm off to bed.

Goodnight!

New Every Morning

Lamentations 3:22-24

English Standard Version (ESV)

²² The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;^[a]
     his mercies never come to an end;
²³ they are new every morning;
     great is your faithfulness.
²⁴ “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
     “therefore I will hope in him.”

Thanks, www.biblegateway.com! 

This is the verse I've been mulling over for a few days. His mercies (not mine) are new every morning! And He knows just what we need.

I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately at all the things going on in my life. Homeschooling, a 2 and 4 year old that both have chicken pox, a 3 month old baby that needs nursed every three hours, my inability to keep the house even straightened up let alone clean, my apparent lack of training my kids because they constantly leave their toys... and everything else out, my lack of self discipline because I'm guilty of the same thing, and more. Sometimes it just seems like too much! 

BUT, my hope is in Him! I can choose joy in the midst of the trials and the daily grind of life because of Him! I have eternal life because of Him! And nothing can separate me from His love! (See Romans 8:31-39). So, today that is what I'm going to hold on to: His love and His mercies, regardless of my circumstances. 

Have a joyful day!